Aaron’s Retro Reviews: Michael Jackson’s Moonwalker

Hey everyone, it’s Aaron again. Now I hadn’t intended on doing one of these Retro Reviews so quickly, and I also hadn’t intended on doing this game. However, in light of the recent events as most of are well aware of and is even reported on this site, the King of Pop is dead. I could make jokes at his expense, but I chose to do a sort of tribute by playing and reviewing this game, because I think we can all agree Jackson’s music was awesome. That being said I will be totally honest, I’m not going to sugar coat a game if it’s really abysmal. But enough preface, let’s get reviewing “Michael Jackson’s Moonwalker” for the Sega Genesis.

In 1988 during Jackson’s glory days he released a film called “Moonwalker” which was actually a series of music videos on tape. One in particular was the extended video for “Smooth Criminal”, in which Michael plays the role of a benevolent gangster? Who fights other gangsters to save children? Apparently Jackson, while playing guardian to some waifish orphans stumbles upon the Lair of one Mr. Big, who wants to get people addicted to drugs on a global scale starting with children. Michael and a child are discovered overhearing this plot and so Mr. Big has to rub them out. Mr. Big attacks Jackson at his abode, but is eluded when Jackson evokes his magical shooting star powers and turns into a car….yes.., I’m serious. After a chase sequence he arrives at club 30 to meet the children and busts out smooth criminal. After the club scene Mr. Big gets a hold of the little waif girl and Jackson goes to save her. When Jackson is captured, Big threatens to inject her with narcotics but she wriggles loose and so Big decides to waste them both. It is then…sigh…I can’t believe I am writing this…He transforms into a giant robot. Yes…Yes…I know…look it up on youtube, you can’t make this stuff up, and this is coming from someone who’s job it is to make stuff up. Anyway, Mr. Big is defeated in his mountain fortress by Jackson who then turns into an aircraft and the kids are saved.

So Mobile suit Jackson saved the day and defeated Mr. Big, who was played be Joe Pesci (funny guy, loved him in home alone). Then time went on and one would think a plot like this would never see the light of day again…but when Michael took an interest in video gaming the video reappeared in a way similar to herpes, and in 1990 the video game version of this video hit arcades and console across the globe. Anyway, let us begin the analyzation. Moonwalker’s controls are well…like it sounds…about as strange as walking on the moon. There’s a button for simple jumps, a button for you basic attacks, and then…-_- the magic button. The basic attacks consist of kicking and punching? Casting out sparkles. But a strangely redeeming factor is the magic attacks. Charging up slightly will allow mini-mike to fire off his hat and make people explode which is nothing too impressive. But the fun comes when you charge it for a certain amount of time, which causes Mike to unleash his dance attack. This move causes every enemy on screen to bust out dancing to a Michael Jackson tune, with mike leading. After the dance most of the enemies drop dead. It’s a sight I find never gets old.

The game follows the plot of the video for the most part…even most of the “zones” reflect places in the video. You begin at club 30, make your way through the streets, the forest (actually a graveyard), the caverns, and finally Big Boss…erhem…Mr. Big’s lair of drug induced doom. The stages are sort of bland but it was the very early 90’s, many games were blandly isometric. But the music is really good, because it’s essentially Mikes greatest hits in Midi form, so if you like his music you’ll enjoy the tunage. The only things that liven up the game play aside from bustin’ out enemy break dancing fests, are occasionally you run into “shooting stars” which turn Michael into a Fu…Effin Optimus Prime who is mostly unstoppable. The final level of the game is flying through space to finally defeat Mr. Big, and this is the worst level of all. To be honest I enjoyed the game, but this level was just shameful. You really can’t keep track of what’s coming at you, it’s clunky control wise and it leads to an ending that basically is nothing more than” Congratulations”.

So all in all, I actually enjoyed the game…but it’s really more fun for a run through of the first few levels, especially when you dance attack some zombies and re-enact thriller. But it’s not worth completing really, the King of Pop was a great musician…but his creative writing needs…needed a little work. But was this Michaels last dabble in the world of video games? It is now widely rumored that he worked on the music for Sonic 3 but was removed from the project due to the arising of certain allegations and court cases that got Jackson in some hot water. After that to my knowledge that was the end of Mike’s short lived career in the world of the vidya. As for the way his life went after that…well I have no comment, but I will say…remember the good times. Remember the good stuff Michael did…and I will say this game was generally something worth remembering because it was really far out there and weird, and actually sort of fun. So, goodnight strange almost alien to us king of Pop, may you rest in piece, your legacy is preserved.

P.S. Here’s a link to the high rez Sparkster pic, just incase anyone wanted to see the detail. So until next time, goodbye, see you next time Retro gamers!

Hi-Rez Sparkster

Aaron’s Retro Reviews: Rocket Knight Adventures

Hello, I’m Aaron. You may remember me as one of the hosts of the last few podcast’s you’ve listened too. Well, from time to time I’ll also be reviewing some classic early Nineties video games. For what reason…well, hell its fun, and you may learn about a

Few overlooked games from the era, as well as a selection of fan favorites and flops.

So without further ado, let’s get reviewing with this post’s game; Rocket Knight Adventures.

In the late 80’s Nintendo’s Mario pulled video games out of the depression, and became a figurehead to one of the most famous and recognizable franchises in the world. Everyone knows who Mario is just by merely seeing a picture of him. Naturally in order to compete, Sega created their own mascot franchise, know as the Sonic the hedgehog series. Sonic was edgy, cool, and fast unlike the slow bumbling plumber and this lead to Nintendo and Sega’s heated rivalry during the 90’s. With sonic moving unit’s the way he was other companies wanted to created their own cool, edgy animal to bring in the big bucks. Many of them tried and failed, and most of those mascot attempts faded into obscurity. However, there is a character though overlooked that really may have given Sega’s cash-hog a run for his money; and that character is Sparkster from the Konami Classic “Rocket Knight Adventures”.

Rocket Knight Adventures came out in 1993 to little fanfare or notoriety, and was Konami’s toss into animal character ring. However, an immediate difference from other companies was that Sparkster was not designed so edgy; he was actually sort of cute. Sparkster is a possum…well maybe a mutant possum or something, most possums look horrifying. I digress, he’s not just a possum, he’s a knight in a kingdom of other Possum creatures. But that’s not the selling point, the catch is that he’s a “Rocket Knight”, basically he’s got a rocket booster on his back. So what’s so cool about that you may ask yourself? And I may ask “What’s wrong with you!?” Let me put this in perspective for you, picture a knight. Now this knight has a sword and thick armor, so he’s pretty powerful right? Well picture that same knight coming at you at 120 miles per hour. If you don’t think that’s a crazy concept, I don’t know what is. Anyway, Sparkster lives in a peaceful kingdom of medieval/mildly technological possums. One day this army of Pig creatures with vastly superior technology show up and invade the kingdom, and not only that, but Sparkster’s rival, an Ex-communicated Rocket knight called Axel Gear (cool villain name) kidnaps the princess. (so now you have some sort of Mario/Sonic combined angle.) So Sparkster sets out to liberate the kingdom and save the princess…your usual gaming fare.

The game play is fairly straight forward, you can move around left and right, (mostly right) and can jump around, sort of like many plat forming characters from that time. But Sparkster has a sword, no jumping on or killing with fire pellets in this game. The sword can do better damage when making blade to enemy contact, but also can send out damaging sword waves? That can knock out most of the little enemies in one flick of the B button. But the greatest tool of all in Sparkster’s armory is the rocket pack. The pack can be charged at any time by holding down the attack buttons, and when released once the fuel gauge is full it sends Sparkster flying in which ever direction you’re holding. This is not only for getting around many obstacles in the game, but if you get creative you can use it against enemies and some crazy trick shots around the levels.

The level design is another nice feature of this game, not only visually but seemingly every level has a hook or neat little modification so that it plays different than the last. As you traverse the kingdom you see many surreal environments from a vibrant castle village, to a mirror like lava filled cavern, to a dingy industrial city and even outer space. Every environment plays differently, in some you’ll ride in a mine cart, hang from an airship, or fly through a city on an infinite rocket boost. The music in the game is quite catchy, so much so that if you a nerdy 90’s gamer like me, you will find some way to put it on your I-pod. The highlights of the levels are the bosses, which are practically dropped on you at every turn. From battle mechs, to robotic dragons, and even a mad pig computer thrown in for good measure. Even when you think you have defeated the last boss, well…I’m not going to spoil anything for you readers out there, play the damn game. Although…I did kind of blab it out on the podcast….never mind just play it anyway.

Sparkster did make enough money to warrant two sequels, one for the genesis and on for the SNES. Both titled “Sparkster” and released at the same time the two games are entirely different, but the design of the character Sparkster is changed to a more edgy appearance I assume in an effort to compete with Sonic. If you play RKA after reading this review and are looking for a recommendation as to which sequel to play next, I recommend the SNES version as it is more of a spiritual successor to RKA, the Genesis version has less of that charm. After these sequels Sparkster disappeared into obscurity, occasionally popping up in cameo’s in Konami games, and most recently he has made a true reappearance in NAMC: Track and Field as a playable character. But personally I would love to see a new full fledged RKA game, preferably for a handheld for splendid 2-D goodness. In the meantime I’ll have to make due and get my hands on a Sega nomad so I can play some RKA on the go…yes…it’s that addicting.

This is Aaron a.k.a Aaronthewolf, signing off till the next installment of “Aaron’s Retro Reviews”. Oh, and the picture included for this post I made personally…I think its pretty rad. I will eventually have a full rez at my art site...or something.